Don`t smoke cigarettes there are cooler ways to die.
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Facebook status
I always start my diet on the same day... tomorrow!
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Textaphrenia. A disease found in teens, in which they think they have heard or felt a new text message vibration when there is no message.
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I wish Pokemon battle music came on whenever I see someone that I hate.
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Odontophobia is the fear of teeth. LIKE if you are afraid of teeth!
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When you were little, “I’m going to tell your mom” was the scariest sentence ever.
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Future:When a kid asks what a word means,I`ll tell them to bring me a dictionary.Then I smack them with it & tell them to Google that shit.
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I don`t even look like Nicki Minaj - Cotton Candy
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My bed is more comfortable in the morning then it is at night.
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Putting your hand on your hip for a picture because you`re a great teapot.
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