Facebook status

I got fired at my job as a cop. Apparently it`s inappropriate to yell "Pikachu!" while I tase people
-unknown
Real friends don’t get offended when you insult them. They laugh and call you something even more offensive.
-unknown
That moment when you pour a bowl of cereal and realize there`s no milk so you sit there, wondering why bad things happen to good people.
-unknown
In my hour of darkness, she is standing right in front of me, speaking words of wisdom, let it be. - The Beatles
-unknown
Pain makes you stronger. Fear makes you braver. Heartbreak makes you wiser.
-unknown
1. You cant count your hair.
.
... ..
2. You cant wash your eyes with
soap.
.
..
3. You cant breathe when your
tongue is out..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
Now please put your tongue back
inside and honestly like if it was
outside :P :D
-Johnny
LIKE This If Your Parents have ever Called you with wrong name. :)
-unknown
Like if: Bathrooms with no mirrors should be illegal.
-unknown
If I saw you, I would:
[] Run up and Hug you. :D
[] Scream your name super loud..
[x] Say hello ( :
[x] Smile : )
[x] Give you a hug <(^.^)>
[] Give you a high-five hand hug
-unknown
LMS if you Have - Tattoos , Piercings , Dimples , Back Dimples , The Cake , A Curfew , A Boyfriend , A Girlfriend , A Cuffing Picture , A Crush , A Wife , A Husband , Anything Pink In Your Room , Anything Blue In Your Room , A Loving Mother , A Laptop , A Computer , A I Phone , A Birthday , A Job :)
-unknown