Sometimes the smartest thing you can do is play dumb.
-unknown
Facebook status
I put the pro in procrastinating.
-unknown
On a scale of one to Lord of the Rings, how much did you walk today?
-unknown
"what drink would you like"
me: "тнє вℓσσ∂ σƒ му єηємιєѕ"
waiter:
me:
waiter:
me:
waiter:
me:
waiter: "is pepsi okay"
me: "тнє вℓσσ∂ σƒ му єηємιєѕ"
waiter:
me:
waiter:
me:
waiter:
me:
waiter: "is pepsi okay"
-unknown
where can I get one of those kim kardashian or paris hilton jobs where they just kind of pay you to exist?
-unknown
You know you`re ugly when you call yourself ugly and no one disagrees with you.
-unknown
Happiness will never come to those who fail to appreciate what they already have.
-unknown
If you have something serious to tell me, call me. I don`t like reading novels of text messages.
-unknown
Dear people who question why girls go to the bathroom together, Hermione from Harry Potter went alone and got attacked by a troll.
-unknown
Vodka = Fun water
-unknown