Don`t be ashamed of who you are. That`s your parents job.
-Dorian
Facebook status
Sorry that offended you, I really didn`t think you`d get it.
-Dorian
Shoutout to this ATM fee for making me buy my own money.
-Dorian
Sometimes, you just have to talk to a two-year-old to understand life again.
-unknown
I`m not lazy, I`m just extremely motivated to do nothing.
-unknown
Playing an instrument can raise your IQ by as much as five points.
-unknown
Nobody likes surveys. I don`t know how I know that.
-unknown
Running seems like a great idea until you actually start running
-unknown
Some cunt in a nightclub came up to me and said, "I get 20 times more girls than you do, haha."
Me: 20 x 0 = 0.
Me: 20 x 0 = 0.
-unknown
People who are strongly connected with their friends have stronger immune system than those who keep themselves isolated.
-unknown