Don`t think of yourself as an ugly person. Think of yourself as a beautiful monkey.
-unknown
Facebook status
"I wasn`t that drunk!" "Dude, you went to the train station and rammed against the wall, trying to get to Hogwarts!"
-unknown
"I wasn`t that drunk!" "Dude...you were yelling `Come at me Bro!` to the mirror."
-unknown
Graduation Speech: I`d like to thank the internet, Google, Wikipedia, Microsoft Word, and Copy & Paste.
-unknown
Girls: Never lower your standards for a guy, make him raise his standards for you.
-unknown
LIKE if: Looking at a textbook and thinking, "What a waste of a tree"
-unknown
*Police pulls me over* POLICE: "Do you know why I pulled you over?" ME: "Because you were bored and wanted someone to talk to?
-unknown
Strength is nothing more than how well you hide the pain.
-unknown
There`s photoshop, autotune & plastic surgery. Too bad there`s nothing for your ugly personality.
-unknown
Your reality is reflection of your mind.
-unknown