Tell her she`s beautiful instead of hot. She`s a woman, not a temperature.
-unknown
Facebook status
Guy: "Age is just a number." Me: "Well then jail is just a room."
-unknown
How you gon play hard to GET...when you`re already hard to WANT?
-unknown
Txt messages from a stalker - You gave me a wrong number, but I got the right one.
-unknown
Sometimes I just wanna ask my farts, "Why Now?" (._. )
-unknown
LIKE IF: Saying `eww` when you hear someone`s name that you don`t like.
-unknown
Facebook is just like jail, you sit around and waste time, you write on walls and you get poked by people you don`t know.
-unknown
"Let`s talk dirty ;)" ... "What?!" .. "I said it`s 12:30!"
-unknown
Oh, you can tweet but not text? Makes perfect sense to me.
-unknown
I`ve always wondered how police on bikes arrest criminals... It`s like, "Alright, get in the basket!"
-unknown