I just burned 1200 calories. I forgot the pizza in the oven.
-unknown
Facebook status
That awkward moment when you`re reading someone`s shirt & it looks like you`re looking at their boobs.
-unknown
$19.99 because $20 is an outrageous amount of money.
-unknown
Facebook should allow you to automatically un-friend your Ex from all of your friends.
-unknown
"Is there gonna be food?" "Yeah" "Ok then i`m coming ."
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I’m in shape. Unfortunately, it’s the wrong one.
-unknown
I hate when new parents ask who the baby looks like. It was born 15 minutes ago, it looks like a potato.
-unknown
I don`t have an attitude problem, you have a problem with my attitude. That`s your problem, not mine.
-unknown
Dear dreams, stop ending right when I get to the good part!
-unknown
I want a cute, long relationship where everyone is like "damn, they`re still together?"
-unknown