I have a date tonight, with my bed. We`re totally gonna sleep together.
-unknown
funny facebook status
No, I`m not lazy. I`m just very protective of my seat.
-unknown
Wake Up. Kick Ass. Repeat.
-unknown
Lazy Rule: If you spill water. It will eventually dry
-unknown
Whats black and always in the back of a cop car?
A seatbelt.
A seatbelt.
-unknown
Me: *Cleans room* *Finds missing homework, old books, and cure for cancer*
-unknown
I`m making a killing selling home security systems. It`s easy. All I do is say "Hello"... At 3am... while sitting on the end of their bed.
-unknown
_eyyy se_y _ady -Hangman Style
-unknown
Nothing is scarier than attempting the first fart after having diarrhea.
-unknown
Midnight bathroom trip...eyes forward, avoid mirrors, happy thoughts!
-unknown