Every mother on earth gave birth to a child. Except my mother, she gave birth to a legend.
-unknown
funny facebook status
Roses are red. Monsters are green. Just look in the mirror. You`ll know what I mean.
-unknown
do you think clouds look down on people and think “that ones shaped like an idiot”
-unknown
never look back... unless an attractive stranger is behind you.
-Jose Juan
" Hm. Teenagers. They think they know everything. You give them an inch, they swim all over you. " -The Little Mermaid
-unknown
I don`t care how old you are... when the ketchup bottle farts, it`s funny.
-unknown
In high school, teachers had to raise up their hand to speak to Chuck Norris.
-unknown
That depressing moment when you realize the trash goes out more than you...
-unknown
My voice sounds great when I`m singing with my earphones on, Then I take them off and I realize I sound like a dying walrus.
-unknown
nipple is a bad word. say “sensitive chest raisin" instead.
-unknown