Never make the same mistake twice, There are so many new ones, Try a different one each day.
-unknown
funny facebook status
I just read last year 4,153,237 ppl got married. I don`t want to start any trouble, but shouldn`t that be an even number?
-unknown
is going to jail, directly to jail. he is not passing go. he is not collecting $200.
-unknown
Procrastination (verb)-What you`re probably doing now.
-unknown
I don`t have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.
-unknown
Wow. Sarcasm. That`s way better than having friends.
-unknown
Everyone has photographic memory... some just don`t have film.
-unknown
Blonde goes into PC World looking for curtains, assistant says: `You don`t need curtains for a PC`. Blonde replies: `Hello, but mine has windows!!`
-unknown
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall - he didnt get bruised, he didnt get bumped - Humpty Dumpty bungee jumped.
-unknown
Went home at 2 with a 10 and woke up at 10 with a 2.
-unknown