Parents call it "talking back", we call it "answering your question"
-unknown
funny facebook status
3 reasons to stand up: 1) to get the remote 2) to go to the bathroom 3) because you`re the real slim shady...
-unknown
Lies That Always Worked - I`ve never done this before, but you`re Different!
-unknown
Voldemort is like a teenage girl. He has a diary, a tiara, a special cup, a pet he adores, and an obsession with a famous teenage boy.
-unknown
That awkward moment when you realize you were talking to yourself.
-Marian
Dude! He just called you a thief! Oh HELL NO, hold his wallet!
-unknown
Friend: "Does this outfit make me look fat?" Me: "NO, your fat makes you look fat!!!"
-unknown
Dear white crayon, What is it that you do here... exactly? Sincerely, the other crayons.
-unknown
I watched Transformers today, and I`ve spent the past 2 hours in my garage telling my car I know his secret... He`s shy.
-unknown
If A Couple in Love are called Love Birds, then a couple who`ve fought with each other should be called Angry Birds.
-unknown