Last year I asked santa for the sexiest person on earth, the next day i woke up in a box...
-unknown
funny facebook status
"Did you just fall" "No, The floor just jumped up" "oh, really" "yeah"
-Tazhane
"There`s nothing to fear but fear itself"...yea, i guess you haven`t met my mom yet.
-unknown
“Are you asleep?” “No I was in coma, thanks for saving me."
-unknown
Dear Face Wash Commercials, Nobody actually splashes their face with water like that. Sincerely, my bathroom is sopping wet now.
-unknown
Buy a ship, name it relation, now you have a relationship.
-unknown
Dear Dora, How do you get that t-shirt to fit over your head? Sincerely, Thats physically impossible.
-unknown
A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station..
-unknown
I won’t take a bullet for anyone because if I have time to jump in front of a bullet, you have time to move.
-unknown
"Dude! He just called you a thief!" "Oh HELL NO, hold his wallet!"
-unknown