*Woman gives birth* Woman: I think I`ll name her Sara. Doctor: I`m sorry, but that name`s already taken.. May I suggest Sara89 or Sara_13?
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funny facebook status
"How old is your baby?" "36 months." WHY CAN`T YOU JUST SAY 3 YEARS OLD?!
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Friend: I`m so over him! Me: Cool, let`s go get a soda. Friend: HE DRANK SODA....
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I`m painting a blue square in my backyard, so that Google Earth thinks I have a pool.
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WHAT IT SAYS: "Do not touch." WHAT I READ: "Touch when nobody is looking."
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"DUUUUDEEEE, I just saw you on TV!!!" "Really!? OMG what channel!?" "On Animal Planet!"
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Voldermort`s face is flat because he ran into the wrong wall at the train station.
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I`ve always wondered why "W" is called Double U when it`s clearly Double V...
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The Lazy Rule: Why Should I make the bed if I`m gonna sleep in it again?
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"If you fall, I`ll be there for you." - Floor
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