Facebook status

my parents treated me like a princess my whole life you think I`m expecting less from a man? lol
-unknown
When you just got comfortable and your mom yells for you to do something.
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After I peep my "friends" snapchat stories and see they`re hanging out with people they said they didn`t like
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When that direct deposit hit and you act bougie like you didn`t just have only $4.58 in your account yesterday
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When someone tries to hurt your feelings but you`ve been dead inside for years
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I can transfer data from my brain to someone else’s by opening my mouth and pushing air with vibrations in their direction.
-unknown
It`s okay to pee in the ocean since 95% of urine is water and the nitrogen in urea is used to feed ocean plants.
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when you`re upset about something but don`t want to talk about it because you`re just overreacting so you just lay there and pout
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when he`s fine af, and then he looks at you so you try to play it off like you weren`t just staring him down
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when you are reading a funny tweet to your friend and they cut you off and say `I`ve already seen that`
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